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Bridging the Culture Divide One Exchange Student at a Time

Two American families share their experiences as home hosts

When considering how to get involved as a citizen diplomat, home hosting opportunities demonstrate well the fact that citizens can have a positive impact on America’s image abroad without necessarily leaving the country.  Opening a home to an international student is a wonderful way to involve the whole family in learning about other cultures and development of mutual understanding, and often result in international friendships for life.  However, aspiring host families understandably can have many questions about the experience, including how will inviting a stranger into my home for a few months or even a year impact my family and my view of the world?  We found two exemplary host families with years of experience who were eager to share their stories of the positive changes and enrichment that hosting has brought to their lives.

Pam and Scott Jones from Wilkes Barre, Pennsylvania and Lief and Michele Seymour from Folsom, California are seasoned “hosting veterans” that have both been hosting exchange students since 2000.  The Jones have been hosting through the ERDT/SHARE! organization, while the Seymour family uses Cultural Homestay International. Each family’s experience is unique, but most importantly they both see hosting as a positive and personal opportunity to bring two cultures together to learn and grow from each other. 

Pam and Scott Jones were newly-weds when they first decided to bring a student to their home in 2000.  The first experience was so enjoyable they have hosted 12 students from eight countries since.  Pam and Scott view this opportunity to make the world a smaller place by getting to know each student’s customs, food, and culture and sharing their own home life and culture in America with the students.  The hands-on learning is a way to bring diverse people together for good and continue learning after your schooling is over.  Pam says, “It is stuff you can’t learn from any book or in school.”

Pam and Scott and some international students they have hosted

One unique aspect of the hosting experience offered by the Jones’ is that the students are viewed from day one as important members of the “Jones International Family,” as they like to call it.  They even present the incoming student with a t-shirt that says “Jones Int’l Family” on the front and their name and the year the student stayed with the family on the back.  Welcoming the students in this way helps everyone to feel immediately at home, so they can open up and connect with one another making the exchange more beneficial to all.  The lasting connection between the family members is what Pam and Scott are most proud of.  In fact, four former exchange students recently returned for Pam’s 30th birthday celebration, and two students visited over the Easter holiday.  A family reunion is planned for August 2010 with as many of their former students returning as possible.

Whether they met each other during their stay in the U.S. or not, the Jones say their former students call themselves “brothers & sisters” and visit each other in Europe and Asia when they can.  Not only does the Jones family introduce American culture to the exchange students, but they create a network of students who share a common bond and take an interest in other family members’ cultures, expanding their global view and shrinking the world even more. 

To answer the often asked question of why they host exchange students, Pam replies, “We do this because of the memories we create and the bond we will always have…it is amazing just knowing that Scott and I have the capability of making someone’s dream that lives halfway across the world come true.  They leave with the key to not only our home, but to our hearts since our hearts don’t know the distance to where they are.”

While the Jones’ had not traveled outside the country prior to hosting exchange students, Lief and Michele Seymour had an extensive international travel resume before they started hosting students here in the U.S.  Their story starts with Michele, who grew up in Hawaii where she was exposed to the Japanese culture on a regular basis.  A third generation Japanese-American, Michele is quite familiar with cultural and language barriers because her grandmother immigrated to Hawaii as a young woman but never learned English, thus making it hard for Michele to communicate with her. 

Her family’s multi-cultural background and the fact that she had relatives living in Japan inspired Michele to host an exchange student from that country in 2000.  She has hosted one student for a full year (Nao) and at least six others for shorter home-stay programs.  Her family’s connection with the students has continued long after the initial hosting experience, as the Seymour’s later visited Nao in Japan on two separate occasions.  Michele says all of her hosting experiences, big or small, stand out and reflect a common thread that motivates her as a host:  the students say that they felt like family and not visitors during their time in the U.S.

For a perfect example of how hosting a student can influence your outlook on the world and on different cultures, look no further.  Michele states that she now has a more balanced view of Japan and its people because of Nao.  Nao didn’t reflect the normal stereotype of a shy Japanese girl and showed a deep appreciation for both cultures.  The hosting experience also helped Michele better understand and appreciate the two different cultures, which shaped who she is as an individual.  She realized that not only can she have a positive impact on the students she welcomes into her home by sharing her life and culture, but the students have also allowed her to grow and learn more about who she is as person.

If Michele could take away one aspect from the experience, she says it would be “that people from different cultures desire similar goals, but sometimes use different methods to achieve them.  People put up defenses when they lack understanding of each other and exchange programs help bring people together and discover common ground.”  By reaching for this common ground, hosts are able to break down the defenses and barriers put in place by lack of understanding and enable others to experience the common bonds that we all share. Michele found her hosting experience impacted her in ways other than just her views on the Japanese culture and people.  The exchanges have opened the door for her to become more involved in the program as a teacher and academic coordinator.  Her children have also been positively influenced as she has noted an increased interest and appreciation of cultural diversity, in addition to sensitivity and empathy towards people from other cultures. 

Her last bit of advice for those wanting to get involved as citizen diplomats or become a home host family is, “The best thing Americans can do to make a positive impression is to have an open mind.  We could think about what someone from another country is feeling and experiencing being in a strange new world and do what we can to help that person feel more at ease.  If we are visiting another country, we should show friendliness and respect for that country and its people. “

These two hosting experiences are unique and different in their own right, but share a common theme.  Giving an international student the opportunity to live with your family and for all involved to learn from one another, you are changing the world one individual at a time.  The lasting friendships and bonds host families and international students share with each other have no borders and are gifts that will be treasured for a lifetime.

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The U.S. Center for Citizen Diplomacy would like to thank ERDT/SHARE! and Cultural Homestay International for providing us with two terrific examples of exemplary citizen diplomats and host families for this article.  If you would like to submit a story to be considered for our newsletter or website, please contact the Director of Communications at info@uscenterforcitizendiplomacy.org.

In addition to hosting of international students, home hosts are also needed for visitors coming to the U.S. for other types of exchanges including business, arts, and other avenues.   Not all hosting opportunities require visitors to stay in your home - volunteers are also needed to simply host a meal, accompany visitors to local cultural sites and events, or provide personal transportation while they are in town.  If you are interested in hosting international visitors in your area, view our International Opportunities page for a list of organizations looking for citizen diplomat volunteers.